Anxiety sucks.

I sit here,
on the verge of an anxiety attack,
of proportions I've never known.

Panic flutters inside of me,
as my poised fingers shake.

I need help. I can't get through this alone. 

But I must.
I have no one to blame.
It was my choice.
I wanted to pry myself out of
my comfort zone.
Fling myself out in the open.
With no safety net.
Can't afford one.
Because I might back down.

But they depend on me.
Look up at me.
Expect I have all the answers.
But I don't.

Oh, gods, I don't.

I want to forget about this whole mess.
I want to go home.
I want to curl up with them.
And stay in the comfort of my world.
The familiarity of it.

I can't.
I must try.
Because when asked,
Why do you want to live,
I answered,
There's so much out there to discover!
And there is my answer.

There's so much out there to discover.







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